Kays Translations

Chapter 58. Side Story – Lingering Effects of middle school syndrome

Author Note:

This is a bonus story.

It’s not connected to the previous events.

It takes place sometime after defeating the Rock Turtle, and before volume 3.

***

There was a really well-paying cleaning request.

But… how should I put this? I feel like Matilda-san is acting a little strange.

“Ah… it’s a cleaning request. Are you sure you want to accept it?”

She was wearing her usual perfect, lovely smile—but something was… off.

Still, the reward was too good to pass up.

Blinded by money, I took the job.

It was to clean an empty house.

I arrived at the site.

The house had quite a, how should I put it, an atmosphere.

From the outside, it looked like one of those stylish Western-style mansions, with ivy crawling up the walls.

A few black birds—probably crows—perched on the roof, some flying around while cawing loudly.

Even though the weather was clear, the whole place felt oddly gloomy.

I had the key, so I unlocked the door and stepped inside.

The air was thick and dusty. It smells moldy? There’s a strange smell.

An uninhabited house deteriorates quickly the floorboards creaked with a long groan.

For now, I opened every window I could to let the air in.

Even just that helped lift the mood a little.

Alright, time to clean.

Where should I start?

Cleaning an entire house by yourself is a daunting task.

But cleaning is only hard when there’s a lot of stuff you have to avoid or be careful around.

This house barely had any of that.

There were large pieces of furniture, but not much else. It actually looked like it’d be easy to clean.

　

The request itself didn’t ask for it to be spotless—just to air it out and give it a light cleaning in places that needed it so as not to damage the vacant house.

Which made me think… I’m really getting paid this much for that?

What a piece of cake.

As I planned my approach—first start with dusting from the top, then sweeping loosely, then wiping it done—I heard a loud bang.

I went to see if the wind had blown the window shut, but when I checked, it was still open.

Maybe it was a different room?

Then I heard another bang from a different part of the house.

I went to check again—same thing. The window was still open.

What was that?

…Well, things like that do happen sometimes.

Alright, let’s clean up.

As I’d been told, there were some cleaning supplies in the storage room. I gratefully borrowed them.

Mask on, gloves on, duster in hand—I got into cleaning mode, only to immediately start coughing from the dust.

There was a lot more than I expected.

I wished I had some tea leaves or damp newspaper to lay down before sweeping, but I don’t have none of that.

I wasn’t sure if it was worth buying newspaper just for this.

As I was sweeping, being careful not to stir up dust, I heard a crackling or creaking sound coming from the ceiling.

The sounds gets louder and louder.

Ah, that’s just the house settling. Happens in wooden buildings all the time.

And, I could chalk it up to that and let it go…

But, at this point, even someone as dense as me could sense something.

Is there something going on in this house?

I don’t believe in anything occult. I really don’t. But I do experience sleep paralysis quite often.

Sometimes, I get this gut feeling like If I fall asleep now, something bad will happen.

Probably just that my body’s asleep while my brain’s awake or something. Yeah, that’s it.

I think I saw a female ghost when I was little. I was sick with a cold and fever and was lying in bed at the time, so I figured it was a dream.

The wood grain on the ceiling looked like a woman’s face to me.

When you’re lying down sick during the day, you tend to stare at the ceiling a lot. I remember thinking as I fell asleep, “That spot looks like a woman… that part looks like two sunny-side-up eggs…”

So yeah, probably imagination.

I’ve also seen a bird so huge it was unreal. but again, it was when I was little, so it was probably just a dream.

Grey egrets are huge, aren’t they? From a child’s perspective, they must seem like giant birds.

So basically, I don’t believe in that stuff. But I also kind of do. but, well, how should I put it, I do think that there are some mysterious things in the world, or not. You know?

I know, I know—“Which is it?!”

Honestly, I think I both believe and don’t believe at the same time.

Well, that’s it, what should I do?

Here’s a question for you: What lingering effects of your “chunibyo” phase do you still carry?

As for me, I used to read this light novel series—published under a blue-colored label with a name based on the symbol of a certain element —, about a warlord from the Warring States period who is reincarnated and revived in modern times and fights psychically. I was really into it.

They had it in my high school library. That library was suspiciously well-stocked with fantasy and light novels. Tons of mysteries, too.

And—let’s be honest—we all memorized spells from stories at some point, right?

When you’re young and your memory’s sharp, it’s easy to memorize long incantations or dramatic quotes. And once they’re stuck, they never leave. I wish I could use that memory space for something else…

What I’m trying to say is: I can recite the Light mantra. I even go “Bai!” at the end.

I also read a manga about a bird king who spreads his beautiful feathers at the zoo to attract mates because my cousin had it.

So yeah… I can do the nine symbolic seals (kuji) and binding signs.

Well, I only kind of remember how to do the binding, but I do know that just doing the nine characters with a sword hand sign works.

And grinding your molars together is probably knowledge from the tales of a dozen countries.

I’m alone in this house.

Whether something happens or doesn’t—if I’m alone, I don’t have to be embarrassed.

Though, even if I am all alone … I still think trying the U○○pia thing—is a bit much…

Maybe I should’ve asked Jude-san to come with me. I bet he’d do it with a straight face if I ask him to.

Oh right! I remembered something.

There was this horror series about a terrifying monster that appeared and disappeared with this really cool female exorcist. I think she said deodorizing spray works on monsters.

This house does smell a bit, anyway. Might as well try some deodorizing disinfecting spray.

So, in each room, I ground my molars, did the nine cuts, recited the ‘Kōmyō Shingon’, and sprayed 5 yen’s worth of deodorizer and disinfectant from a 1,000-yen repeat purchase.

Each time I did it, the room felt a little brighter for some reason.

By the time I finished the last room, the air had completely changed.

Turns out… this is a really nice house.

The gloomy feeling was gone. It felt fresh and bright.

For good measure, I recited a Shinto ritual prayer.

The calligraphy school I went to as a child was run by a Shinto priest. When class ended, he’d recite a prayer to the altar in the classroom, so I learned them too.

I felt so much better, and I got the rest of the cleaning done in no time.

At the Adventurer’s Guild, I returned the key.

“Please have the client confirm the work.”

Since the client wasn’t present, payment would be given after their inspection.

“Understood. Um…”

Mathilda-san looked at me, a bit concerned.

There must have been a lot of things that went into that request.

But as a guild employee, there were things she couldn’t say.

I nodded to her silently, looking into Matilda’s eyes, assuring her that everything was okay.

A few days later, I received the payment—with a bonus.

The client seemed to be very grateful that I cleaned it up so well.

Yep, I worked hard on it.

Deodorizing antibacterial spray… seriously useful stuff.

 Tl note:

“Komyō Shingon wo” is a form of the Buddhist mantra. A literal translation would be “The Light Mantra.”This “Komyō Shingon” is a Buddhist term that means ‘Shining words of truth’. (wiki extract)

 Kuji – (Nine Syllable Seals), which are a series of nine hand mudras and associated mantras from Japanese esoteric Buddhism. 

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