Chapter 440: My Life as a Horse Has Reached Its Peak
The early morning was crisp and cold. The black veil of night was gradually stripped away from the sky, and along the eastern horizon, the faint glow of dawn slowly rose, pale light seeping into the world like breath returning to a sleeping body.
By the time the servants of the Marquis’s residence had risen to sweep the courtyards and sprinkle water to settle the dust, Zhu Ping’an had already finished washing up and changed into his riding attire. Baozi, the small maid, arrived right on time, cradling a lacquered food box in her arms. She entered the guest room with light steps and carefully laid out a hearty breakfast on the table, the aroma of warm food spreading gently through the room.
Today was the spring outing—an excursion to enjoy the season. Li Shu would be accompanying the Second Miss and the other young ladies, while Zhu Ping’an would be going with Zhou Pangzi and the rest of the men. It was, no doubt, another manifestation of the old feudal insistence on propriety between men and women, rigid and unquestioned.
As the time for departure drew near, Zhou Pangzi arrived dressed in full riding gear. Without a word, he grabbed Zhu Ping’an and dragged him toward the stables behind the Marquis’s residence, insisting they ride horses together.
To be honest, riding clothes looked unbearably awkward on Zhou Pangzi. No matter how one looked at it, the outfit simply did not suit him. It was as if someone had stuffed a potato into a pair of tight leather trousers—compressed, strained, and deeply offensive to the eye. The aesthetic sense behind this choice was… intoxicatingly tragic.
When they reached the stables, Zhu Ping’an froze on the spot.
That damned Shamate black horse was straddling a glossy, smooth-coated red mare, rhythmically repeating a series of simple, mechanical motions with unwavering enthusiasm. Only when Zhu Ping’an stepped inside did the creature finally climb down, wearing—if a horse could be said to have one—a look of reluctant disdain. It even went so far as to hunch its short body to block the red mare from view, as if shielding a lover from prying eyes, afraid she might somehow be exposed.
“Cough, cough,” Zhou Pangzi cleared his throat, staring for a long moment before finally speaking. “Brother-in-law… your horse, well… it really knows how to enjoy life.”
This disgraceful thing!
Zhu Ping’an glared at the Shamate black horse, overcome by an intense urge to castrate it on the spot. Useless at everything that mattered, yet absurdly talented when it came to flirting. If he remembered correctly, this beast had even managed to seduce another horse back at the Hanlin Academy…
After hearing Zhou Pangzi’s comment, Zhu Ping’an forced an awkward smile, then darkened his expression and went to pull the black horse away. Today involved riding and hunting during the spring outing—having no mount was not an option. No matter how infuriating this creature was, it was still, at the end of the day, a horse.
But to Zhu Ping’an’s utter disbelief, the Shamate black horse chose this very moment to go on strike.
No matter how he tugged, it refused to budge. After being pulled one time too many, the beast simply collapsed onto the ground with theatrical flair, lying flat and rigid, wearing the unmistakable posture of absolute defiance.
Even if you beat me to death, I’m not going!
It sprawled there shamelessly, letting Zhu Ping’an pull all he liked.
I’m not getting up. I’m not leaving. I’m not going!
Zhu Ping’an pulled until the horse’s neck stretched unnaturally long—but it still would not move an inch. A textbook case of forgetting one’s friends at the sight of beauty. This only strengthened Zhu Ping’an’s determination to have it gelded.
“Cough… uh, brother-in-law, forget it,” Zhou Pangzi said, utterly unimpressed by the black horse. “Your horse doesn’t look like much anyway. Even if it did run, it probably couldn’t outrun anyone else. I wasn’t planning on letting you ride this one to begin with. Come on—I’ve got a fine steed in my stable. It was brought in from the northwest, and it’s at least half a head taller than this thing.”
Zhou Pangzi dragged Zhu Ping’an toward the other side of the stables without another glance at the Shamate black horse. There really was no better option. Zhu Ping’an nodded in agreement.
Seeing Zhu Ping’an give up, the Shamate black horse lifted its side-parted head at a proud forty-five-degree angle, smugness radiating from every inch of its body.
Hmph. Pathetic humans. I have already reached the pinnacle of horse life.
I have transportation (myself), property (a luxurious stable), and I just scored a rich, beautiful mare.
Before leaving, Zhu Ping’an ground his teeth and turned to the stable hand in charge.
“Move that red mare to a different feeding trough.”
Let’s see how long your so-called pinnacle lasts.
When Zhu Ping’an finally laid eyes on the horse Zhou Pangzi had mentioned, his contempt for the Shamate black horse deepened to an irredeemable level.
Now this—this was a horse.
A tall, powerful steed with a proud stance. Its mane flew freely, every part of its body perfectly proportioned. Muscles rippled beneath its coat like flowing water, brimming with strength. It was obedient, yet alive with spirit.
This was a true fine horse.
Leading the steed out of the stable, Zhu Ping’an joined Zhou Pangzi and a group of young nobles from nearby marquis, duke, and count households. Together, they mounted up and rode toward the outskirts of the capital.
Zhu Ping’an recognized many of these spoiled heirs. Quite a few were the same fur-clad youths he had encountered upon first arriving in the capital at the city gates. Others had come to the Linhuai Marquis’s residence after the provincial exam results were announced, mocking Zhou Pangzi—and Zhu Ping’an as well. After learning that Zhu Ping’an had placed first as Huiyuan, however, their attitudes toward him had noticeably improved.
Xu Laosan from the neighboring household was there as well. Beside him stood someone even more aloof, three or four years older—likely Xu Lao’er. There were also many sons of meritorious families whom Zhu Ping’an was meeting for the first time.
Zhou Pangzi introduced Zhu Ping’an to the nobles he knew, and soon the entire group spurred their horses forward, heading toward the spring outing site outside the city.
When riding, these young lords were exactly as they had been at first meeting—laughing loudly, racing their horses, competing for speed without the slightest concern for the crowds filling the streets. Clad in bright garments, riding spirited horses, they thundered past like a reckless storm.
Some even deliberately charged into the densest parts of the crowd, listening with delight to the chaos of screams and scrambling footsteps, laughing uproariously as they galloped away.
Zhou Pangzi, burdened by his weight, was slower than the others even on the same breed of horse, and soon fell behind. Zhu Ping’an did not ride quickly either, wary of injuring pedestrians, and thus also lagged at the rear.
“Brother-in-law, you’re a real one,” Zhou Pangzi said, assuming Zhu Ping’an had intentionally stayed behind with him. He raised a thumb in gratitude. In the past, whenever he rode with this group, he was always the last. This time, at least, he wasn’t alone.
Zhu Ping’an smiled faintly and shook his head, offering no explanation.
Up ahead, the young nobles shouted and laughed as they rode through the crowds. The people lining the streets scattered like plague-stricken victims, dodging in panic—angry yet silent, afraid to speak. The nobles, meanwhile, seemed to revel in this fear.
“Haha! Brother Liu, doesn’t this feel just like charging into battle—cutting through the enemy as if they’re nothing? Damn, this is exhilarating!”
They likened themselves to generals storming the battlefield, and the fleeing civilians to enemies who had lost their nerve, cheering again and again at the thrill.
If you’re so capable, go charge the Tartar cavalry on the frontier. Go rush the Japanese pirates along the southeastern coast. What kind of bravado is it to bully unarmed commoners on your own patch of land?
A bunch of parasites destined to be discarded by society.
Zhu Ping’an watched the laughing figures ahead, shaking his head in deep disappointment. One day, these people would be installed by their families into the military, into government offices. Hidden dangers, all of them…
Ahead, a woman walked with a woven basket strapped to her back, holding a child in each hand. On her left was a girl of eight or nine, on her right a small boy of three or four. She was likely a villager from outside the capital, bringing her homegrown fruits and vegetables into the city to sell.
With so many people around, she failed to notice the riders charging toward her. By the time the nobles arrived and the crowd scattered like startled birds, the woman could only hurriedly pull the children closer, shielding them as she tried to move toward the edge of the street.
The nobles at the front managed to steer clear, but several riding side by side in the middle had no time to dodge. A galloping horse slammed into the basket on the woman’s back, knocking her violently to the side of the road.
Fortunately, there were no hard objects there. She scraped her scalp, but suffered no serious injury.
“Looking for death? Go find yourself a crooked tree and hang from it somewhere far away!” one of the nobles shouted back when he saw she wasn’t badly hurt. “You scared my horse—can you afford to pay for it?”
With a few curses thrown over his shoulder, he spurred his horse onward, never looking back.